Homeless in Kotor

So one of my worst fears realised, I was homeless in Kotor. It was as if the calm I'd imbibed of the island was being tested - how long would it take before my heart rate increased? Heading into town, I saw a sign for rentals and apartments and popped in. A lovely lady offered me a place for €40 which would make this the most expensive place of my trip. 

Damn. 

I was directed to the office at the town gate and she said there were cheaper options available. The annoying man on the bus - there is alway one who talks loudly, takes phones calls, and tells strangers his life story - was in front of me. He rented a place for €45 a night which didn't reassure me. Luckily the woman got my measure and marked on the map a hostel in the Old Town. 

A hostel!

I went to investigate. There was a dorm bed at €13 + €6 for dinner. The guys at reception were helpful and confirmed there was no way into Macedonia that evening. Using the wifi I investigated carrying on to Budva but, you know, it was so tempting to consider sleeping in a dorm. I haven't done that since I was on a school trip to Germany. What could go wrong? So I opted for a top bunk, dumped my stuff, realised I had no nightie, shrugged and wandered into town. 

It was beer-o-clock. As I was wandering through the town I came to a pretty square containing the Cat Museum. Over lunch today I've discovered that there used to be a girls' boarding school here so it was completely closed off at one time. The name of the cafe - Ombra - is a reference to the beautiful plane tree in the middle of the square. It was planted in 1667 to commemorate the devastating earthquake. The sun is currently greenly shining through the leaves and brightening the grey stoned buildings and pavings. 

After a soothing beer I was ready to meander down to the sea to work up an appetite for dinner at 8. The weather was looking a little uncertain but it was nice to be out and about with time to kill. I stopped to read a boat trip sign and was accosted by a gentleman. Apparently there was a speed boat waiting for me...I hate to disappoint, so I joined two French people on a ride around the bay. Given I'd saved a fortune on the room, €15 for a couple of hours seemed OK. We went out to St Mary of the Rocks and it was suitably somber and quiet, made more atmospheric by the storm rolling in from the mountains. It was given colour by one young American who was waxing lyrical about a white chocolate/strawberry magnum which is only available in Europe. She talked about it non-stop for all the time I was in earshot. Oh to be young and vacuous again! 

We jumped back in the boat and headed back over the darkening sea; skilfully the pilot skirted the clouds and drove us under a rainbow. We waited for the storm to pass around us and he apologised for the speed he was going to have to do to get home. The rain felt like darts on the skin - it was brilliantly invigorating. The mountains above the town truly showed their majesty. And we weren't too wet thankfully. 

I headed home to a remarkably quiet dorm and made my bed ready. Turns out you have to make a list if you're on a top bunk and mildly forgetful; water, phone, charger, bathroom. After I'd climbed up and down several times, I was happy to just chill before going down for dinner. Potluck was roast chicken, vegetable rice, cabbage and bread. Very tasty it was too. I was joined by a cat and two lovely German ladies and we nattered happily until it started to get noisy in the dining room. 

The gentlemen were in full swing and had started a loud drinking game. Frankly this was our cue for going to bed...the jollities of the town, combined with the music downstairs meant that the hubbub in the first floor dorm was fantastic. It was at that background level which I find it easily to be lulled to sleep by. Odd, but better than sudden loud noise in the quiet. That was to happen later when a couple of very drunk guys came in, and when two persistent morning alarms went off. I was inwardly chuckling at what the Furious Bad Tempered One would do to the inconsiderate pissheads. But overall the sleeping experience wasn't that bad. Maybe that's the island calm? 

Over lunch today, I was briefly joined by an elderly Norwegian man and I told him about my stranded night. He was a hostel veteran because they are generally more convivial to solo travellers. He queried a mixed dorm but it hadn't even crossed my mind. It had felt perfectly safe; at midnight I'd been chatting to a local guy who the hostel employed as a guide. It seemed normal to have the usual 'pub' chat about the history of the place, politics, seasonal lifestyle, lack of opportunities for young people, then say good night, and go to respective bunks. People were remarkably relaxed, and I would definitely stay here again. 

I could say this place left me climbing the walls. And it truly did! After visiting this place for the third time, I finally climbed up to St John's Fortress, and it was incredible. In hindsight I wish I'd gone up there earlier to avoid the crowds and see what would have been an incredible sunrise but, still, next time! As a reward for lunch I ordered some fries, and whiled away the afternoon on a sofa in the hostel living room. I'm actually looking forward to getting on this infernal bus just to get some sleep! 

Let's see what happens.. 

More fictional plans

The thrilling night of no electricity will have to wait for its moment in the light for a bit longer because I'm on a jaunt. I've promised myself a bit of travelling all summer but held off until now because it's cheaper, less crowded and I've been busily testing Šipan's beaches. It's been an amazingly relaxed few months but it's time to bestir myself in preparation for a London visit in October. So what better way than a whistle-stop tour of south-east Europe?

I was having a moment of fear and indecision on Saturday. I had all the relevant computer windows open and all it needed was the first step: that initial bus from Dubrovnik to Kotor. And once I had the place in Ohrid booked then I was fully committed to getting there so late the next evening, it was basically morning. According to the online timetable*.  Precisely why I was avoiding Tirana which doesn't even have a bus station. I've never done a late night scary transport terminus alone. The elegant Kings Cross/St Pancras one late night for 2 hours doesn't count because there was a Starbucks and a lady with whom to natter. And in Roma Centrale and St Petersburg I was with people. So I wasn't doing a random street in a city I don't know. 

So anyway my fears boiled down to -  what if I missed the connections? What if even coastal touristy Albania was too scary? What if the ferry ports were too confusing? And worst of all, what if I was overcome by nauseating baroque-itis in Lecce? Basically I was nervous about leaving my safe island bubble, which has become a kind of 'life detox' place, and I was thinking of every excuse possible not to go. And I'd made chocolate brownies...

After a stern talking to by a travel addict friend I took the laptop by the horns and formulated a plan. Because some of the logistics were complicated - some overnight travel - I downloaded a nifty little app called TripHobo and started booking rooms and ferries. The plan is to go from Dubrovnik to Kotor, and that same day overnight Kotor to Lake Ohrid. Then after a couple of days chilling, on to Durrës on Albania to see a different seaside town and also so I could get the ferry to Bari. I've never been to the heel of Italy so a quick jaunt to Lecce, Florence of the south sounds fab. I thought this would be better than just getting a bus back from Ohrid to Dubrovnik via Skopje. Ferries are fun and I would be straight back to Dubrovnik from Bari. Anyway in summary it is a reasonably ambitious schedule for a 12 day trip. And it was a plan which is scary in itself. 

This morning I fell pretty much at the first hurdle. To be honest it might even have been last night. I've been helping the landlord with some cleaning and to say thank you he took me out for pizza. He'd offered me fish but pizza meant a screechingly exciting scooter ride across the island, so no brainer! He turned up at 8pm and was horrified at my inability to pack. Or wash up. Or be in anyway ready. He continued being horrified as I made free with the Tabasco, and then ordered rum and coke. Good job he didn't see the pre road trip champagne shenigans... 

As we got home I remembered my bus ticket and ferry confirmation needed printing. Problem. His printer had no ink. Fine, there must be an Internet point in Dubrovnik bus station you can**. I continued packing, put things ready, set the alarm for 6am, and collapsed into bed in a pizza/beer/rum stupor. No I still hadn't washed up but I had put the brownie and emergency paprika crisps in my backpack. Priorities. To my horror the alarm woke me up as requested and I completed the general clearing up, legging it down to the car ferry with 10 mins to spare. For the first time ever I lay down on one of the seats and fell asleep! I was so bewildered when we docked I got lost at the ferry port and found myself wandering up to a massive cruise ship. That wasn't right...

Turns out you can't print your tickets at the bus station. So I turned around and went back to my favourite cafe which has an information point next door; this is what happens when you deviate from the norm. And go out without caffeine. After finally drinking coffee and waiting til 9am when they opened, I spoke to a nice chap who managed to get evernote to talk to his printer. I had a ticket! I returned to the bus station and rearranged my bags. At 10am sharp we were off, and I was looking forward to a pleasant afternoon in Kotor. The next leg of the journey would hopefully commence at 7pm. 

As promised and expected the landscape of this region always leaves me gasping. The road hugging the coast is incredible and worth the price of the ticket alone. The last time I was here the weather was indifferent so it was lovely to see the sun twinkling off the bay. We arrived and I retrieved my overly large backpack, then popped over to the ticket office. 

Dobar dan. Molim Vas jednu kartu u Ohridu. Jedan smjer. 

Hahahaha! Oh how the travel gods laughed and mocked my optimism and pronounciation. She showed me the screen and it was blank. No buses today as the winter timetable had kicked in. So here I was in one of the most expensive cities in the region, my beautiful accomodation 10 hours away, with only a few euros to spare. 

Bugger. 

*Fiction. Lies. Perfidious bastarding timetable. 

**Dubrovnik. Seriously sort this out!!

Another welcome visitor to Suđurađ

Dubrovnik Shoes

The island is pretty much the centre of my universe, and so my capacity for excitement has perhaps shrunk to fit a slightly smaller place. Outsiders may feel that bowling competitions, film festivals, klapa concerts, saints' day processions, tiny classical concerts, and good pizza is perhaps stretching the definition of 'excitement' too far. I notice when the local bench is repositioned, the seasonal changing of the field's fragrance and, like every other local, roll eyes at the weekly youthful Antipodean incursions who enjoy very loud music and occasionally ring the church bell at 3am.

 

So when friends visit I like to push the boat out for them. As it were. All visitors here are subjected to hours on ferries! As you've read there is usually wonderful swimming and incredible beaches, long hot walks in the fields, early morning kayaking, hours of paddle boarding, and really lovely food. Louise was no exception and I'd been planning for her arrival for a few weeks. She adores Croatia and so was really looking forward to the trip. She was coming in to Dubrovnik to see me especially, before flying up to the bright lights of Zagreb a few days later. Last time I saw her, we had both ended up there but I wasn't going to be persuaded this time.

 

I had the usual early morning start to greet my guest, with the treat of coffee and a fresh bun. We corresponded with each other from our respective modes of transport; me from the bus station, to her on wifi in the sky, and we had already starting laughing. Apparently one of her suitcase was looking forward to being pulled by aunty Clare. As her cases are legendary for their mischievous antics, I was already regretting not bringing a muzzle and ankle guards. My rucksack was already full as I'd picked up some extra essential bits from konzum. Deodorant, for instance. Not to mention crisps and wine.

 

Considering we'd had so little sleep - 3am start for her - we were surprisingly chipper and had a sunny journey back to mine. Given I have so much sun cream at home, she hadn't brought any so fair skin was already starting to glow on the ferry. The cases had already caused a commotion and were busy chasing other patrons. As we arrived into Suđurađ, and hauled everything past the bar, the big one must have caught a whiff of previous parties and ran over her toe in its hurry to order a round of Sambuca shots. Naughty case.

 

Finally with a little help from landlord senior we were soon in my little flat making a cup of tea. And checking out Jenny's abandoned beach shoes...no joy there as they were a little large. We chilled out on the terrace with some melon and peaches and just enjoyed the tranquillity. I demonstrated the local way to deal with wasps *SHOOOOO*. Then she spotted one of the best insects I've ever seen. Climbing the grape picking ladder, we watched him for ages wondering how we could help him, as frankly he was going nowhere. A ceramic plate didn't work but we were able to coax him onto a piece of paper and then on to the bamboo screen. We assumed he would head up to the safety of the vines.

 

We finally hit the town beach where, without Adriatic Sea shoes, pebbles are a little pebbly. It was good to stretch and refresh after a day of travelling. Before I can assure Marija that my guests are kayak safe, I like to see them swim! We paddled around for a bit, then diet talk made us think about food. So whilst she went for a shower I prepared stuffed peppers, which take a couple of hours to cook. In the meantime the stupid insect was waving precariously at a seagull. We left him to it. I was hazily aware that the weather could turn nasty at the start of the week so suggested we make the most of the evening sunshine. We put on appropriate footwear and went up to my favourite look out to see the sunset. The timing was perfect - the lighting effects were spectacular.

 

After swimming and hill climbing, the hearty peppers were welcome, and washed down with a glass of white they were suitably local and tasty. We enjoyed the sounds of the evening, discussed a Sunday 'plan of action' and decided on a short post-dinner stroll. We were accosted by a young gentleman who offered to buy us drinks. This place is fabulously friendly! By 10.30pm we were all falling asleep - middle aged party animals - and looking forward to an action packed day of walking, paddle boarding, food and laughter. As the weather forecast was doubtful we also had contingency plans for baking and make-up practice but that is another story.

 

Oh and we still had Adriatic Sea shoes to track down.

Change of mind, change of growth and what to do when the sand runs out?

My body aches. A 26 hour labour and five epidurals later I was given a child. I looked into my husband's eyes which welled with satisfaction and completeness. This was our child! On 6th of August 2010 at 9.28am I was declared a parent. I knew that after  nine months of carrying him, I was sure to love him and look forward to cuddles, not so much the lack of sleep but the love I would give him would be indescribable.

So why did I feel empty?

He was so innocent; he looked at me, he looked in my eyes with longing. He was new to this world and needed care and protection. He was how I felt - extremely vulnerable. For the next two nights I desperately tried to feed him, for 18 hours straight. I was doing it right, I wasn't holding him right, I was just inept at being a mother! When the nurse finally came round, they eventually realised that he had tongue tie. The tongue had fused to the bottom of his palette, not allowing him a good suckling motion.

After three days, 4 variants of catheters later, and one to go home with for three weeks, I was told I could leave. Chris (my husband) clambered in with all sorts of excitable goodies with which to lavish him. Car seat being a priority obviously. We loaded the tiny thing into this mechanical transporter and my dad arrived with his own form of mechanical device to take "us" home.

By this point, the bewilderment of one minute having a growing something inside myself, to now having a real breathing screaming - screaming did I mention screaming? - somebody now sat next to me was dawning.

23 years old and the oldest out of my siblings to become a parent, still felt like my innocence was stolen. You see, I was never given a childhood. I had a hard testing upbringing, for which perseverance had become my life-line and friend. My innocence was stolen from a young age, and my eyes had witnessed horrific events that could never be erased. There was never a device to quite literally take your eyes from your head and wash away hurt and pain. If the eyes were truly the gateway to the soul then mine had become broken.

What does this have to do with a baby, right?

Well I never loved mine, not straight away! It became quite apparent that a week in to being "mummy" my main priority was cleaning. I had just been told, after the fourth rush back into hospital, that I had gall stones and would need my gall bladder removed. Great, so not only was I now incontinent but I now needed surgery! Twenty minutes of sleep in a week and manically cleaning became my obsession.

I knew how to clean, I knew how to make everything sterile, I knew how to make everything safe! Safe enough so that this thing didn't die on my watch. Every few seconds I would go in to make sure it was breathing. Chris became the father he was destined to be. He was kind, he was caring, he was affectionate and endearing, all the qualities I lacked. I turned into a mechanical robot trying to preserve a life, terrified I might kill it.

The thing was, I  was terrified of the responsibility, terrified of the uncertainty,  terrified to love.
I had spent most of my life wishing to be dead, and now something needed me, depended on me, to live. Needless to say my behaviour didn't go unnoticed. A crisis mental health team were called in and I was carted off to hospital!

Instead of me checking it, someone was checking me. Ten minute checks to make sure I hadn't hanged myself became normal after the 5th check. It was inevitable. They gave me 800mg of Quitiapine and 400mg of sertraline and after a week or two, they were happy that I had stopped calling my baby "it". He had a name: Reuben.

And it is a wonderful name.

After what seemed like an eternity I was getting better, resuming night feeds and learning to look at my baby. I was told I had post partum psychosis and was bi-polar. Ok, what did that mean? I never really found out, all I knew was that it meant some kind of mood disorder! As I learned more, and found out about my illness, my medication changed and I became more stable. Correctional surgery was given and after spending countless therapy sessions, of talking and helpful strategies I started to feel like a mum!

By the time Reuben was one-year old, I came to love him. I never really understood love, but my child everyday showed me what it really meant to love somebody unconditionally. He wasn't aware of my affliction or pain, all he knew was that a cuddle from me and a kiss on the hand meant he trusted me enough to slip blissfully into a protected sleep and dream.

He turned 6 a couple of weeks ago!

It now breaks my heart he is growing up so fast. It took along time for me to realise how much I could love this boy, and by god, I would kill anyone that tried to hurt him! I can not turn back the clock, I can only wish that I could have been the perfect mum. But a few words from him "you're the bestest mum" melt my heart and touch my soul more than anyone will ever know.

I love you, Reuben.

You are my world!

Seasons, seasoning, reasoning

Pinch punch first of the month! September is one of my favourite months; a few more weeks of ever lengthening golden light, squidgy purple berries and honeyed Russet apples, warmer clothes and a snug duvet, as well as exciting new lectures and exhibitions to brighten the dark evenings. In Northern Europe, September primarily exists as an apology for a terrible summer and is the only time, weather-wise, that I wish I was home. Even rain and mist is appealing as seen through the rainbow of falling leaves.

This year I'm greeting September with incredulity because this means I've been here seven months. It seems incredible that we arrived on a dark March morning with a long summer in front of us. Strangely it is partly the weather that has truncated time - by having mostly warm sunshine since June, days have disappeared in a languidity of pleasure and colour. Only the occasional storm has offered punctuation marks in time; a difference to mark the passage of summer, and most recently the appearance of dewy mornings to announce an Adriatic autumnal turn.

Which has necessary got me thinking about plans. I'm officially here on Šipan until the end of October leaving me with two months to decide what to do next. Some things are yet to be confirmed but are certainties nonetheless. A trip to London for blood tests and medication has to happen before the end of November. It's not life or death, just means there won't be any hormone based meltdowns over winter. This ensures I'll also be properly equipped clothes-wise for winter because I possess nothing thicker than a jacket and fleece jogging top. I also need a trip to Split to retrieve a duvet and my miniature library!

The other certainties include travelling more. Someone has suggested they fancy seeing Barcelona in October (subject to a million responsibilities) so I'm open to suggestions regarding interesting places to stay there. I've seen a boat on Airbnb that could be interesting for a week although it specifies 'no number 2s in the toilet'. Given my digestion on a week long diet of churros and manchega...but I digress. I'm mildly regretful that I haven't used my time to see more of this country and its neighbours, but height of season isn't conducive to cheap, quiet, comfortable getting-about. And frankly I've enjoyed an anxiety free life. At the end of September I am considering resurrecting the carefully mapped Balkan odyssey, and taking in Albania, Macedonia, Serbia, and Hungary. Using the February road trip as inspiration, it would be interesting to just book the first couple of nights to be secure, then wing it from there and fly back to Dubrovnik from whichever Eastern European city I get stuck in after a couple of weeks.

Did I mention regrets? A conversation yesterday about whether I had any has prompted a few thoughts. If I went with one of my options and returned to London in November I would regret nothing - despite the travel mentioned above. Although this could be remedied by shipping stuff home and back-packing leisurely to the UK via Austria, Czech Republic, Poland, the Baltic states, Scandinavia and the North Sea. To be honest I could do that anyway. There is only one event which to this day makes me shrivel with dismay at my stupidity. Although in reality the reawakening of true lingering conscience and care for others is to be embraced rather than easily shrugged off with regrets. Croatia has given me a sense of domestic peace which I've never experienced before. Although cooking contrary style meals for locals terrifies me! I hadn't realised black pepper or mild paprika were classed as ljuti.

When you've finally let go of neuroses and realised that nothing but loved ones are important, it's easier to let go of other desires and pulls. Instead of trying to constantly chase and expand to fill an entire universe, my universe has found and shrunk comfortably around me. I have caught my own precious falling stars, no longer having to reach unsteadily for those always out of reach. I am finally content with my abilities and what I have, so there is no further need for obsessing.

This place has made me a better, less-superficial person because I have time to stop and consider what would be better for other people. I'm never going to be perfect (who is!?) but I'm not finding myself so distracted and disconnected as I used to be. The road - or ferry - to recovery is still long, requiring patience. A few months here is just the start. It is easy to be content with scrubbing toilets when your head is preparing an article, a short story, or thinking about the next freelance writing job. Perhaps this is who I truly am. Let's hope September continues to bring forth a harvest of ideas to welcome the olive oil. Hours on the Elafiti ferries to restock my flour and baking powder once again provoking homespun profundity; or perhaps I'm simply being profoundly domestic.

Bank Holiday on Šipan and Lopud

It was Summer Bank Holiday in the UK, so I thought I'd take a break from the old work routine and go on holiday for a bit. You know, have a lie in, read a good book and generally enjoy what would inevitably be a rainy day. Then I woke up and realised that I was still here, and I could pretty much do what ever outdoorsy thing I wanted because sunshine! There was stirring outside as someone decided that nets needed bringing in so, instead of being cross about being awake,  I decided to embrace the morning.

The village was bathed in golden morning light as I quietly launched one of Marija's kayaks into the glassy water. The bottom of the sea was bluely visible until I was well beyond the protective stone harbour walls, and I enjoyed the sensation of easy silent paddling. There were no power boats to worry about and I was keeping an eye on 7am Hanibal; he didn't mind and we didn't come to blows because I was exploring the watery caves of Ruda Island by the time he chugged past.

I struck out for Lopud, with fond memories of the last time I did this. It had been my birthday and the night before the contrary trio had hit the rum badly. So the hangover had been ferocious - my brother had set the spanking pace and we had blindly followed him, hoping he'd find coffee and cake somewhere. We struck gold at our destination and the resultant caffeine, sugar and cold water hit us beautifully. By the time we had got back to Šipan, we'd felt almost human again!

Anyway, there was no head cloudiness on Monday and it was a lovely morning to have coffee and fresh doughnut by the sea. With a flash of inspiration, I picked up an extra bun for a man-who-might-appreciate-it back home and popped it in my bag. I then thought about wine for later and took a detour to the tiny market. As I was in a kayak I thought better of the huge 3 litre bottle on offer and sensibly only bought a couple of normal bottles. Imagine developing a leak and losing the cargo?! Or what if I was boarded by pirates? Who knows what might have happened.

On my shopping trip, I'd clocked a poster advertising a concert of classical music in the church.I had a small splash around on the sandy beach, giggled again at the memory of an ex-flatmate's ability to clamber into a stationary kayak, and headed home. As I paddled back I thought about the music and was determined to try to make the concert...this would mean a begging of a favour and I wondered if it was possible. Does a bun count as pre-emptive bribery?

The appreciative one was having a coffee after a unsuccessful bout of net reeling. I think he was touched, frankly I was ready to go get out of my wet shorts, so I had scooted off as he was mid-munch. I had a relatively quiet day and after making myself useful, decided to mention that I wanted to go to Lopud for a concert, and please may I have a lift back. Looking up from the plateful of sardines that I'd prepared, he fixed me with an exasperated look.

Problem.

It is now dark enough for night fishing so they were going out. If they had a boatful of fish, they were not going to wait for me, and if they were out until 1am, then I would just have to wait. Therefore no guaranteed lift from the landlord. The best offer I could get on a water taxi was 250 kuna and I had also checked AirBnB for a room overnight. Basically, going out here is as inconvenient as going out in Bristol if you live in Yate/Chipping Sodbury. Except that there you're paying £25 for a theatre ticket and £50 for a taxi...scratch that. I'd rather be here. So bravely setting off on the 5.50pm ferry I took a leap of faith, trusting that I'd get home somehow.

I arrived in Lopud in dry clothes, which made a change from the kayak soaking from earlier. With a small amount of foresight I popped into the Lafodia Hotel lobby where I happen to know they have a library of books for guests. I nabbed the only English one available - seriously, people, do you not read on holiday? - and scarpered to the nearest pizza place for a quiet couple of pre-concert hours. It does seem criminal to eat pizza on an island but I do get endless amazing fresh fish at home, so I never feel too guilty. On my evening stroll, I chuckled at the outlandish ways I could get home; perhaps a wheelie bin and paddle; a tractor engine powered pallet raft; a plastic sunbed contraption?

Some lovely friendly English people were sat nearby and we had an excellent natter which was an excellent way to pass the time. *waves*

In the event the concert was spectacular and there was no fault to be found in the fluting, cello-ing and piano-ing. I could happily have listened to them in St John's Smith's Square, or similar intimate venue in London. There is something very special when you get a talented cellist and flautist together, and the instruments just sing. Again, the piano makes an uneasy third in such a trio but it seemed to have a rare understated delicacy which didn't dominate.

Moment of truth. I wandered up to the far end of the harbour and pondered the wisdom of a glass of wine. I decided against it, and bought a bottle of orange pop instead. I had no idea how long I would be waiting. There were no messages, which was both promising and not. Boats came and went, my book was read and finished, and I ambled back to a comfy looking park bench. It was gone half 11 by then, and then I saw the musicians walking past...as a final act of desperation, shyness overcoming lunacy, I wondered if they were going my way. Maybe English subtlety is truly unknown here, as I said;

'Hello, thank you for the lovely concert tonight. I wonder if you are going anywhere near Suđurađ as I appear to be stranded here?'

They were going back to Dubrovnik. Oh well. Perhaps a Croatian would have got a better response with a more direct question.

A few more centuries went by and cafes were closing. Then finally I saw boat lights. It was my now extremely cross landlord who had dashed back from a mediocre fishing trip, got in the other boat, and come out to collect his errant guest. He wasn't as annoyed as he was when I punctured his bicycle tyre, but he was definitely not amused. Still, he flung a coat round me and we powered back to Šipan in few minutes. To top it all, when he asked me to throw out the fender, the rope wasn't attached to the boat. Well done Skipper. Least I remembered to hang on to the end.

*sigh*

I reminded him that there was wine in my fridge. He brightened a bit. The problem he has is pretty much the same the world over. Responsibilities, stress, exhaustion, and needing to work in a dangerous and low paid, uncertain industry, when other people are out having fun AND then expect a free taxi service. This is enough to make any person slightly snappy. Helpfully pointing out that classical music wasn't his bag, 'jebeš klassikal music!', I topped up his glass solicitously. I pondered when the next concert on Koločep was. Apparently as 'his most troublesome guest' I'm definitely swimming back from there. Jebem ti majku!

The Coral Kosjenka

Sea stripes

Turquoise slices

 Pebbly froth

Flinty golds

Rhythmic diamonds

Across the bay


Unusually the stifling atmosphere of the scholarly London university library was dragging heavily on my torso making it hard to breathe. A gap in the persistent rain outside had sent shafts of weak sunlight through the windows, lighting up the dust drifting like protozoa through the heavy air. The reef of textbooks on antique corals with their many pearls of wisdom were for once failing to inspire me, and instead, were hemming in my imagination. It was like diving through murky harbour water; every sense was unnaturally and dangerously stifled. I was suffocating.