Tuesday, 19 June 2012

Burn, baby, burn

It's a fact universally acknowledged that my flatmate hates exercise. If it doesn't involve lifting martini glasses, looking at shiny things or being distracted by lights dancing on water, then frankly she isn't interested. So I got thinking about alternative ways of burning off calories.

1. The obvious (don't ask me to elaborate)
2. Walking up escalators on the underground
3. Taking the stairs instead of the lift
4. Getting off a stop earlier on the bus.

The whole underground question is going to get interesting during the 'World Sporting Event that is happening in East London'. It has already had us reaching for our maps whilst thinking of alternative routes to the simplest of places. I have established I can run/walk the several miles to work but it turns out she draws the line at walking 3 hours to work. And then back again. Some people...

5. Boris Bikes - A great way of zipping round London but only on weekends for me as I have the road sense and attention span of a hyperactive spaniel. Turns out she can keep her eyes on the road, cycle in a straight line and not get totally distracted by people in Lycra.

6. Housework - I don't know how this is done. Cleaning here is done by an array of vigorous fairies.

7. Thinking really hard about stuff - We decided last night that the brain burnt off a lot of calories. So we are both thinking *really* hard.

8. Lifting books - This is an excellent one for a librarian. Maybe me and her can job swap for a bit...

9. Shopping - Sadly now that the food shopping involves less House of Lidl vintage bardolino, bags are lighter. Perhaps we should buy more melons? I understand there is a fabulous recipe for a melon daiquiri and it would involve lifting of glasses, healthy fruit and the merest soupcon of rum. A win all round.

10. Strolling -This one is the best. We can stroll for miles. In fact, if you pop round and we're not in, we're either ignoring you or strolling around our amazing part of shiny London town. It's also exercise strolling around art galleries/museums, giving applause, and buying books. Obvs. 

Not going to happen
Let's face it, here at Contrary Towers this is the best exercise list we are going to achieve, apart doing what the happy little micoach app tells us. We're never going to be doing push ups on a park bench or dropping and giving an instructor '5' anythings. 

Of course, we may change our mind about that.

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