Turns out that Contrary Towers is subject to the laws of nature after all. Who knew?! We had no more loaves and fishes. And a limited supply of other fridge comestibles.
As just demonstrated by Ben Miller at the Royal Institution, whipping up something simple isn't rocket science... Indeed I wonder if he could come round and sort out our thermonuclear grill? Oh, and make us a Gordon Ramsey beating Victoria Sandwich?
Anyway I've been having pizza cravings all day and the flatmate always fancies a dirty sausage so we collaborated over that famous Brown family recipe. Cheesy Beanos have supplied late night drunken snacks, hangover cures, sophisticated brunch fare, 11pm emergency study food to generations of Browns.
There is also a rule concerning the Cheesy Beanos' purity. Bread, beans and cheese. Nothing else. Ever.
This is why I found myself chopping and frying off spicy German sausage with spring onions and adding to a gently simmering tin of beans. My flatmate cooks the best beans, always with the warning touch of cayenne.
Once the beans are nicely done, toast (carefully!) one side of the bread. Turnover and spoon the bean mixture on to the untoasted side. Do not overload. Place slices of cheese on top and return back under the grill. If you're skilled you will end up with bubbly cheese and no escaped beans on the floor of your grill.
Slide on to a plate and sprinkle with chives. Not too many because we've worked out where the calories are coming from: our big fat chive plant. Obvs.